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Judgement vs. Understanding

December 11, 2018 by Brandon Mikel Paul

“Through judging, we separate. Through understanding, we grow.” -Doe Zantamata

I used to work at a coffee shop.

Sometimes we would have annoying and entitled customers that talked to me as if I were beneath them.

You know… the kind of customer that is rude, selfish, and doesn’t even thank you when you go out of your way to do something nice for them.

When I got these kinds of customers I would have automatic thoughts like “This person is scum!” or other thoughts like “I hope they slip and fall on the way out.”

And of course this was followed by me promptly going back into the kitchen and talking trash about them.

I was so quick to judge people based on how they were acting.

But that was before I started reading and learning to think for myself.

Once I started to educate my brain I noticed my automatic thoughts began to shift.

Instead of immediately judging people for being nasty, I started to ask myself:

“What life circumstances have led this person to behave this way? Are they going through a tough time right now? Does anyone in their life show them love and compassion?”

My judgement had shifted into a desire to understand.

Judging is easy because it is automatic and doesn’t take much proactive thought.

Understanding is harder because it requires patience, compassion, and a willingness to believe that good hearts can get caught up in ugly behavior.

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